Instead, here are a 11 ways to (pretty much) say I love you when you aren't ready to say it back yet. So OP's SO is needing "words of affirmation" from OP in order to feel loved. Every night before bed I get a kiss and a goodnight and I lay there wondering why he’s not saying it, feeling it. The language in which you naturally express love is also going to be the language in which you naturally want to receive love back. I will admit that I was losing patience. After so long, you just need to hear it. 12? He said it first about two weeks after we started talking. You can't put a timeline on falling in love. It was midway through sex, in fact mid-thrust. Great way of putting it. Didn't want to tell her I just had to shit, so I said "I have to go... because reasons." In my experience it doesn't take long to initially fall in love even though, as you said, love changes and deepens over time. Every time you say I love you even when you don’t feel it, you’re being truthful to the part of you that does love your partner. You should say it as often as works for you, but I mean you both— you as a couple. While I was a little concerned he went out of his way to show me he cared in other ways like buying my favorite candy or doing other nice things. Don’t get needy because not hearing it back makes you feel emotionally insecure. He walked me to my bus that Sunday, and as we're waiting for me to be checked in, I blurted it out. Needless to say, I agreed to make it official but let him know I was not there yet. Say it when you’re emotionally prepared to hear a “thank you” in return. Yeah, it was a little soon, but I just kept pushing through the relationship until I was ready to say it too. In a recent study, 64% of participants were likely to think women were the first to say they were in love, and these professions were estimated to occur close to 2 months into a relationship (Ackerman, Griskevicius, & Li, 2011). He didn’t say it back. Stop wondering if he’s in love with you and know for sure with this list of 21 signs that you’ve won his heart.. It’s pretty black and white, cut and dry, salt and pepper if you ask us, but see what you think. You say it when you mean it, according to whatever the word "love" means to you. He said it back to me with the biggest, dorkiest smile ever, gave me a kiss, and put me on my bus. I did end up completing that sentence first though. He’s not deaf and he doesn’t have amnesia. Point is - wait til you’re ready to say it without cringing/hesitation, etc. You say it when you mean it, according to whatever the word "love" means to you. I was DYING to say it for at least a month before that, but I was too chicken shit. Saying it more than once without hearing it back is just as emotionally gut-wrenching as the first time. My sister and I were just looking at each other like O_O, New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Then he said, "I think I love you." You can also ask them about how they generally choose to show people they care and ask how they like to be cared for. This is how we grow love and shrink fear: by action. Technically she did, about 4-5 months in. One night, we were saying goodbye, and I said, "I love you." A couple of minutes later, she called back and said, "Did you just say 'I love you'?" I have done everything short of saying “I love you” to see if he will say it. He heard it. Last Sunday was our 29th anniversary. Word-barfed it out in the diary aisle of Wal-mart while reaching for almond milk. I said yes. Yeah I feel ya. There may not be an exact right time to say “I love you” — but how do you respond to someone who says the words when you’re not ready to say them back? I said yes. It was dumb, it really was. On the flip side when do you feel it's too soon? One night, lying in bed cuddling I asked "Would it be crazy if I said I loved you?" He did not reciprocate. We've been together a year and a half. I tend to say it pretty early because I'm emotionally intense and feel powerful affection/what I'd describe as love quickly and easily. Does it look like love? You fear that … I’ll be honest though, before he said it, I went to his house to end things because I just couldn’t go on any longer without him saying it. I cannot even imagine the poo fest when she called back. We were 16 years old. Other people feel differently about it and are more reserved, and that's okay. He did. We were friends for about five years before we started dating, and when we started we knew it was serious. He said it first. How long have you guys been together? i guess over 6 months I'd probably start to get worried, but every guy I've been with have dropped the L word EARLY (with my husband dropping it 3 days before we officially started dating. Awww! I hid in my mom's bathroom because he had never seen me cry and I was embarrassed. I dated someone who dropped the words the night he asked me to be his girlfriend and I was in shock. I said it first, several weeks into the relationship. Cookies help us deliver our Services. I said it to my boyfriend about 8 months in and he said it back about 4-5 months later. Saying "I love you" is a Hallmark response. You already said you love him. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. He did 5 months after we started dating on Valentines Day. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. It’s up to you how long you want to be in a relationship with a man who can’t say it back. 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