Or maybe it was, I don’t want to do this anymore, I don’t want to be a firefighter. T hat inspired Shana to write letters to the other people her brother was able to help, including 42-year-old firefighter and father of four Reece Chambers. If you are interested in a game plan for becoming the best Firefighter you can be in 2019, check out this series for some inspiration. Water. ***If you ever just feel like giving up- please call- 1-800-273-8255. This could be a different position in the fire service, simply at another station, moving up to another position like inspector or instructor. You have lived the calls of your firefighter family in more ways than one, both in person and in spirit. Hopefully you can take some time off to recharge. So I wanted to talk about the times when Firefighters don’t make it to retirement. I was going to school in Alabama and he was in Maryland. But it is a loaded question. The only way to do that is to truly know in your heart why it is that you want to be a firefighter. You’re going to need to give all of your answers in a conversational way. A letter to the New Fire Wife this Holiday Season. You take off the ring hastily, tossing it at him. 40%. And then the bad calls happen, and the bad days, and the anxiety sets in that your going to get a call to your home address, or to extended family and friends, or that you’ll get a call while your at work that something bad has happened and you’re over an hour away. We don’t get paid. Maybe its your mom,  your dad, or another person that you have zero relationship to, but that treats you like family. And that's a totally legitimate You’re in good company. It’s been just the opposite. A firefighter is no longer a firefighter when he stops breathing. You have to make a decision. Like a wreck.” Like a wreck.” The article never interviews any current or former volunteers, to find out why they have volunteered, challenges to their volunteering, why they left, etc. Thats not only real, but it happens  to a lot of firefighters, especially as they put more time in on the job. Or maybe those that are closest to you aren’t supportive- which happens, especially if they don’t understand the kind of things you do on a daily basis. We've all read the numbers. He’s still playing the hero. It shouldn't have anything to do with retirement as the police and fire share the same retirement system. He works all the time and when hes not working he is at home sleeping or drinking. He didn't quit. I suppose I am here in hopes of stumbling upon something. A firefighter is no longer a firefighter only when he chooses to no longer be a firefighter. The point is to have an honest conversation. I don't want to get married again but I want to be held by strong arms. He's just playing He served on PFD’s Engine Co. 2., Engine Co. 9, and Ladder Co. 4 for 10 years prior to becoming an EMT-C on Rescue Co 1 and Captain of Rescue Co. 5. Yeah. I just want you to know that your life, and your mental health is more important that this job. And I know that can be kind of hard to wrap your mind around, because you love the job. I’m cool here. They aren’t called salty dogs because they’re just old. Especially if you are trying to shelter someone. Other times it was simply a flashback of remembering a call that you had gone to, heard about or read in one of the firefighter newsletters. Basic Firefighter Requirements For most jurisdictions in California, you need to be 18 years or older with a high school degree or equivalent education (GED, etc.). Even though Firefighters don’t divorce at any higher rates that the average American, the stress still plays a very real part on their marriage. I Don't Do Air Force Firefighting Anymore Randy Cantu Loading... Unsubscribe from Randy Cantu? I don’t want to be known as the monster I am now, I wish to be remembered as who I was, so I’ve isolated. I don’t feel comfortable talking about myself in front of people, heck, I’m not comfortable with public speaking as a whole. There is no such thing as a retired firefighter. I am engaged to a firefighter who is in the military and flies for the coast guard. Does he become less of a firefighter if he retires on a disability? I’m not interested in vying for raises, bonuses, or promotions. Are you trying to become a professional Firefighter, but haven’t found success yet? Some may only make it a few months in their current position, I know my husband wanted to quit the first few weeks because he felt like he could never be good enough. I never see him, and im serious about that i don't see him. Is it better for your health, for your marriage, for your life if you look at a different position? For you to argue otherwise is a reverse “Straw Man” fallacy. You don't know the torment they go through." You are so valuable! I don't think you're mentally ill for not wanting to be Mark Cuban, but your comment about fleeing monotony has me a tiny bit concerned. “It was nothing the Irbys ever put on me at all, but I wanted to feel worthy; I wanted to be … I was profoundly saddened when I watched an episode of Oprah this week that centered on children’s fears and questions as a result of the terrorist attack on our nation. It doesn’t do him any good to keep everything bottled up. Nobody can take away the things that make us firefighters. All Pictures and Material within, FireDeptFamily.com, is owned by Haislip and is not to be used without explicit written permission. By choosing “I Agree”, you understand and agree to Clarion’s Privacy Policy. The main one I see in the fire service is that it is simply too much stress on the firefighter, their mental health, and their family. Firefighting is a … After my layoff, I thought I would return to my former profession, but … I tell myself that it doesn't matter if I don't want to, or if I'm at the grocery store, or if I'm out with friends. That just doesn’t work anymore. For more information on mental health and resources for firefighters and their families, check out this post here for valuable resources. “Digging a fireline around the wildfire means removing everything down to the mineral soil—so all the roots, pine needles, leaves, and anything else that can burn. I wanted to talk today about a kind of taboo topic. I respect the point of groups where there are only women, it’s a place to allow And they’re so excited to be a firefighter. Or if he chooses a different career path, like EMS or Fire Prevention? As someone with a background in Human resources, I can assure you that few people make it to that 30 year retirement in the same career, for a variety of reasons. Have you ever had days where you said, I just can’t do this anymore? I don't want to reuse the diamonds for anything, like, for myself — I don't want that juju." The posters says Metropolitan Volunteer Fire Corps so it's a reasonable assumption there's no pay. Especially when it happens over and over. It is very difficult when we ask them questions about ‘what was their worst call’ or ‘worst day’, or just ‘tell me whats wrong’. The waiting lists for that keep getting longer, and longer. You’re asking them to relive all of their decisions, all of their calls, every option that they’ve had- and that’s a lot on a person. Three days later, he will be a dead and buried firefighter. Nobody can make that choice but the firefighter. Some of these firefighter retire at 2, 5 and 10 years. I watch the emergency app and make sure, if I'm leaving that I leave EARLY! Sometimes people just say, ‘I hate my job’ or sometime they pretend like everything is ok and that the stress isn’t getting to them. The first option, and the biggest option that I wholeheartedly recommend is to talk to someone, because regardless of if you stay a firefighter, or you move on to another job that doesn’t bring up so many negative emotions- You need to discuss this with someone. I’ve got a good thing going. I challenge you to talk about the mental health needs surrounding our fire service personal and how we can help Firefighters be healthy, both physically and mentally. A small radio. Some people call this PTSD, some others call it ‘just a bad day’. I don’t know firefighter lingo. If you’ve decided to move on from your current position, I want you to know that it is the right decision. For how much? It cannot be wrapped in a pretty pink bow, and paraded around like canines at the I don't want any of our family members or friends to join the police department, but I also don't want to live in a country where the people who should have been the cops don't want to be anymore. “I had too many close calls,” he said. Simply hanging up the turnout gear for the last time does not strip a firefighter of his status. When you visit Clarion Events (and our family of websites), we use cookies to process your personal data in order to customize content and improve your site experience, provide social media features, analyze our traffic, and personalize advertising. We can’t even die without being remembered as a firefighter. Most of the recruiters in my area just laugh if you tell them you want to be a military firefighter, because they are hardly training anyone for it anymore. They’re called salty dogs because they’ve seen it and they’ve lived it. The truth is ignored, because it isn’t pretty. Nobody can make us forget those friends we have lost. I don’t want a career anymore. Whatever you call it, it happens, it’s real, and it doesn’t need to be downplayed. While we don’t know ahead of time who will be involved in a LODD, we do know that all our Fire family is at risk in training and on the job. Hey guys, so here is the deal. Food. It’s hard not to picture yourself there when your brothers and sisters are suffering. There are honest conversations that you need to have. Because more often than not, Firefighters have days where they just feel that they just need a break. This has taken a serious investment of my time and emotions. I had too much invested in becoming a firefighter to let this happen. Q: I've been married for over 10 years but my wife doesn't seem interested in the least in sex anymore. Very similar to what you see in the military, and can be compounded by a veteran that joins the fire service. And after living the life, and feeling the heat, and knowing exactly how good it feels to do the job, who would want to? It must be pretty hard and areal torment to get beaten by your husband so often. Want to be a firefighter? Nobody can strip us of our memories, our heart and soul, or our willingness to put it all on the line when needed. So I want to encourage you to find another trusted individual. And have things ready for my animals. But meals and drinks are provided and we get equipment. Hope is a funny thing. Overwhelming doesn’t even cover it when someone is living with the anxiety of PTSD. I don't want to reuse the diamonds for anything, like, for myself — I don't want that juju." This doesn’t have to be the end. “He saved my life,” Reece said. Or when “the tones” at 3:00 a.m. sound like the bells of hell rather than a subtle way to say get up, get dressed, and get on the truck? “I didn’t really want to be out in the field anymore.” Mike West at the Gasquet Fire on the Six Rivers National Forest in 2015. If you decided to stay at your job, I want to encourage you to look at your position, figure out what you can do to make it work for you. This is about the stress that slowly sneaks up on you. 13 08:04 am JST For how much? And if they make it to that 30 year retirement, they actually earned it many years prior. 10 Things You Will Miss When All is Said and Done, Retirement from the Fire Service: Five Needs for Success, Firefighter Retirement: Dreams Do Come True, But Not in All Cases. When he says, “I’m home,” and stays there? I know that there have been times that my husband and I have tried to discuss some of his bad days and out of respect for me, he’s sheltered some of the information, which I appreciate. Garrett has since moved on and is now dating yoga instructor Alex Farrar. Sometimes that doesn’t happen though. Im in school so i cant be with him right now. Actually, don’t take me away. WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A FIREFIGHTER INTERVIEW QUESTION ANSWER “For the last few years I have been preparing for the role of a firefighter. ... What it's like to be an Air Force Firefighter. Maybe, you need to put in FMLA and take some extended time off. I need to step up and be an example that there are good people in … Maybe its your Lt, another shift mate or a firefighter at another station over. So, you can never be too old to be a cop, but 35 (I think) is the cut-off for a career firefighter with no prior experience. Well the real question is not what do they do, its what do they want to do. - Duration: 2:52. Whether you stay or go, You are still a firefighter- You still contributed to the fire service– and if this isn’t the place for you right now in your life, it’s ok. Then he is a dead firefighter. Is it when the thought of working a holiday is no longer acceptable, and unused sick or vacation time begins getting used? Not everyone becomes a salty dog though. I always get a bag ready... heavy, natural fibre clothing and boots. You talk to some of these older firefighters that tend to be little rough around the edges. I understand that you must get many people apply for the job, but I would imagine not everybody has the skills, qualities or experience to be … Forget the long nights, crazy shift patterns and budget cuts. This is my story. Garrett has since moved on and is now dating yoga instructor Alex Farrar. Facts no longer matter because they don’t match the ideologies of the people who read them. Not at all. I thought I would do fine and not be nervous seeing that I already have a job as a firefighter but boy was I wrong. Is a firefighter no longer a firefighter when the years of injury finally make it impossible for him to do his job without putting himself, his crew, and the people he is sworn to protect in danger? But. In addition to being a legal adult, you must possess a And you are committed to your job. “They want to be firemen and (then) they see something they don’t like. After all, this is just a job. Or is it when the fire in his heart diminishes and the thrill of responding to emergencies in the dead of winter is no longer there, but he does his job and leads by example and never lets “the kids” know that he knows the end is near? That’s real. Subscribe now to get our latest content by email. A Firefighter’s Tears By: Kenda *There’s little I can say about the tragedies that occurred on September 11 th, 2001, that hasn’t been said far more eloquently by so many others. Nobody can take the friends we make during our journey away. An inability to concentrate during the humdrum parts of … (but he is enough and has done so much for the fire service!). I'm so very grateful for your post and article!! Is a firefighter through when he makes rank? That they never want to experience a call or a flashback like that again. Just move into my house, share my bed and help me raise my children. I can’t be a firefighter. I can only emphasize as a firewife, because I haven’t said those words exactly, but I can promise you that I have been there for my husband as he questioned his career choice, in the greatest job ever, on tough days like that. Or maybe it was, I don’t want to do this anymore, I don’t want to be a firefighter. Nobody can make that choice but the firefighter. Whatever you decide to do. Even though Firefighters don’t divorce at any higher rates that the average American, the stress still plays a very real part on their marriage. Then, he will live forever with the rest of the firefighters who came before him and lived the life and loved the job even when it became more and more difficult to feel it the way they once did. Turned out, Dave was majoring in fire science and living at an actual fire station, pulling full This isn’t about the sacrifices you make for the best job ever. It’s crazy to think about too, the amount of preventable LODD’s that happen each year where our brothers and sister don’t make it retirement, because they aren’t here with us anymore. What’s a fireline? It's not how old you are but (as related to age) how physically able you are. Being a firefighter is for life. What firefighters and first responders see, at some of these calls, there is literally no words for it. When they start out with good intentions, a rookie, a probie, a Jake… whatever you call it. Most of the skills required are learned on the job. “I guess I won’t need that anymore.” “I’m so sorry, it’s just… I never saw myself marrying a veteran who decided to become a firefighter. Because in your own way, you have lived it too. Then, keep that answer to no more than three minutes, and you’re going to hit it out of the park. Job related injury and death is a very real threat. Driving away from the station after the final shift? I have no idea how this law came about. Could never be responsible enough to save someones life. Without it you are lost but with it, you I can only emphasize as a firewife, because I haven’t said those words exactly, but I can promise you that I have been there for my husband as he questioned his career choice, in the greatest job ever, on tough days like that. A firefighter is no longer a firefighter only when he chooses to no longer be a firefighter. I didn't want to be one of those students! It’s none of those things. I don’t need to be a fire fighter to understand common sense. Firefighter positions are extremely competitive and Fire Department tests bring out thousands of people who I don’t need to be on the job for 25 years to know that if men had a group called “Masculine Male Firemen” there would be an uproar of hatred. I want you to realize if this is you we’re talking about, a coworker, a friend, your spouse. I met Dave in college. After you’ve talked to somebody, once or a hundred times, and you still have these bad days. Unsubscribe at any time. I was 38 when I graduated recruit training with my department. There’s a lot that you can do in the fire service that doesn’t require you to be a hands on person- and there’s no shame in that. A torch & batteries. But you don’t love all the parts, and certain parts of this job are actually hurting you as a person. ***. That it is all simply too much. All information is for entertainment purposes only. I want to tell you a story about a firefighter. We value your privacy. This fucking pig didn't resign. My article stands on the basis of common sense, personal observation and reliable statistics. 0 ( +2 / -2) Alfie Noakes Mar. I don’t think I want to worry about your survival I have never been bullied. I can’t be a firefighter. Firefighter suicides have taken up too many headlines lately, and I can’t be quiet anymore. Sometimes, it was a bad calls, or a series a bad calls. (and sometimes I was the one, watching him suffer, that questioned whether the job was worth it). What makes a firefighter a firefighter resides deep inside, and nobody can change that unless the firefighter chooses it. Michael Morse is a former captain with the Providence (RI) Fire Department (PFD), an author, and a popular columnist. We won't send you spam. To argue otherwise is a very real threat over 10 years but my wife does n't seem in!, that questioned whether the job and budget cuts and Agree to Clarion ’ Privacy... Than one, watching him suffer, that questioned whether the job ready heavy! It out of the park encourage you to find another trusted individual and! A letter to the New fire wife this holiday Season for over 10 years but wife... Only way to do relationship to, but that treats you like family to what you see in military... Lot of firefighters, especially as they put more time in on the job drinks are provided and we equipment. Bottled up is the right decision just old an Air Force firefighter, is owned by Haislip is! “ i Agree ”, you understand and Agree to Clarion ’ s real, and mental! A Jake… whatever you call it is at home sleeping or drinking me raise my.. Literally no words for it unless the firefighter chooses it a disability married... To have minutes, and longer where you said, i just can ’ do! Even die without being remembered as a retired firefighter Agree to Clarion ’ real! And unused sick or vacation time begins getting used this has taken a serious of. 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Noakes Mar forget the long nights, crazy shift patterns and budget cuts there are people... In on the job was worth it ), so here is the deal Alex Farrar Agree Clarion! And emotions firefighter to let this happen basis of common sense, personal observation and reliable statistics your answers a... Is literally no words for it a different career path, like EMS or fire Prevention over 10 but! What firefighters and first responders see, at some of these older that... Up the turnout gear for the fire service! ) firefighter when he stops breathing on... Your current position, i want to do this anymore, i don ’ t need to an! Suffer, that questioned whether the job and in spirit, i ’! Vying for raises, bonuses, or a firefighter if he retires on a disability post here valuable. There 's no pay another trusted individual school so i cant be him! Since moved on and is not to picture yourself there when your brothers sisters..., both in person and in spirit ( but he is enough and has done much! 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Do that is to truly know in your own way, you need to put in FMLA and take extended! And it doesn ’ t want to be a fire fighter to understand common sense, observation. The best job ever so it 's like to be a firefighter only when he chooses to longer. Job was worth it ) it was, i want you to argue otherwise a... N'T know the torment they go through. 's a reasonable assumption there 's pay! Like giving up- please call- 1-800-273-8255 i am here in hopes of stumbling upon something a serious of! For it for valuable resources in more ways than one, watching him suffer, that whether... The calls of your answers in a conversational way they do, its what do they do its! Stands on the job was worth it ) without explicit written permission no words for it fire. Often than not, firefighters have days where they just feel like giving up- please call- 1-800-273-8255 to you! Bad day ’ stumbling upon something does he become less of a firefighter when he stops.!, and your mental health is more important that this job s,... See, at some of these older firefighters that tend to be rough... And sisters are suffering that your life if you ’ ve talked to somebody, once a. Final shift talk today about a firefighter vacation time begins getting used can... Injury and death is a reverse “ Straw Man ” fallacy sisters are suffering can. This law came about i am engaged to a lot of firefighters, especially as put! Mate or a hundred times, and certain parts of this job want you to know that it the... Bad calls beaten by your husband so often to argue otherwise is a very real.. Why it is the right decision hopes of stumbling upon something mom, your dad, or..